So, You Think You Want to Be a Monk? A Not-So-Solemn Guide to the Robe Life
Let’s face it: the world is awash with career advice, but precious few guides offer tips on living a robe-based lifestyle. If you’re scrolling through your social feeds feeling a tad weary of WiFi passwords, KPIs, and existential crises brought on by avocado toast inflation, then perhaps the question has dawned upon you with the solemnity of a 5am temple bell: “how do you become a monk?”
And, more importantly, “Do monks know the secret to happiness, or just how to get up really, really early?” Strap in for an irreverent yet insightful look into the transition from layperson to monk.
The First Step: Deciding to Ditch the Rat Race
Deciding to become a monk isn’t the result of binge-watching Kung Fu Panda (though Po’s discipline is admirable!). According to the story of Phra Goh, Singapore’s youngest monk, it’s a journey born out of both existential questioning and a desire for spiritual meaning. Monastic aspirations often dawn in the depths of difficult personal times (cue dramatic music and a sad, single tear).
A string of childhood adventures — or should we say, misadventures — involving family breakdowns, economic crises that make you rethink Monopoly money, and the kind of deep pondering normally reserved for philosophy majors, can lead to a persistent itch for something more than just financial security.
So, before you book a flight to Thailand, take a moment for introspection. Ask yourself: “Am I ready to swap Netflix for chanting and my relentless pursuit of WiFi bars for inner peace?”
The Parental Conundrum: Selling the Monastic Dream
Confession: becoming a monk isn’t always a group project. Phra Goh’s journey involved a classic reluctant-parent scenario. Breaking the news after his O-levels, his dad was zen enough, but mum needed years of persuasion (and possibly some enlightening PowerPoint presentations on spirituality).
If you’re considering monkhood, prepare your talking points. Remember: “But mum, monks have fewer chores and never have to worry about what to wear!” might not work as the clincher. Appeal to higher logic, promise weekly visits, but brace for resistance. Eventually, a parent’s love triumphs, especially when presented with the prospect of weekly lunch deliveries to the temple.
Getting Ordained: From Amateur Enlightenment to Full-Time Robe Rider
Now for the nuts and bolts. There’s a surprising amount of paperwork involved (even monks aren’t exempt from bureaucracy, alas). You’ll start with retreats — think extended spa days, except instead of facials and hot stones, there’s meditation, chanting, and complete silence.
In Theravada practice, as in Phra Goh’s story, you choose a monastery, possibly overseas, and train as an apprentice for several years. (Five, if you prefer your enlightenment extra aged.) Your daily schedule will resemble a well-oiled Swiss watch: 5am wake-up, chanting, cleaning, morning alms rounds, and — here’s a fun fact — lunch at 11am, but absolutely no snacking after noon. Step aside, intermittent fasting!
Do monks ever cheat with a midnight snack? Sadly, no. The most rebellious a monk gets is a late bedtime, or maybe reading up on spiritual doctrine after hours. Wild stuff, right?
Monk Rules: No Money, No Mercedes, Definitely No Mindless Scrolling
Possessions are pared down to the essentials. If you were hoping to bring your collection of rare sneakers, it’s a hard pass. Monks rely on donations for food, clothes, medical care, and shelter. Sometimes the temple staff acts as your personal concierge — making doctor’s appointments and footing the bill. Bank accounts? Best left to your parents.
Thinking of joining for the cool gadgets? Sorry. Phones are allowed, but only if they’re deemed useful for spiritual life (inviting monks to kung-fu movie night probably doesn’t count). Your personal checklist: robe, bowl, book, maybe a phone if mum insists you check in.
The (Not So) Glamorous Side: Awkwardness and Alms
Are you ready to redefine the meaning of ‘hustle’? Imagine waiting outside a coffee shop, hoping regular devotees will swing by with porridge, while you practice the art of not speaking (called ‘waiting for alms,’ not ‘begging’). For the uninitiated, this can feel as awkward as showing up at a potluck with nothing but a fork.
But in time, that humility transforms awkwardness — and you’ll find serenity that comes from accepting what is given, not just what’s craved. And if you ever doubted your choice, remember what Phra Goh said: spiritual life, even without personal possessions, offered a peace and meaning that the consumer carousel couldn’t match.
Spiritual KPIs: Measuring Success Without the Corner Office or Golden Trophy
Here’s a curveball: monks don’t track progress with performance reviews or annual bonuses. Spiritual growth is all about reducing greed, anger, and promoting goodness (side effects may include a spontaneous smile and slightly improved posture).
In Singapore’s land of KPIs, temples are islands of tranquility, where progress is measured in moments of mindfulness, not material accrual. You can still meet your friends at weddings, give talks at charity events, and even hang out with family (lunch with mum is totally monk-approved).
The Monastic Perspective: What’s It All About (And Is There Really Free WiFi?)
If you’re hoping to find the meaning of life hidden behind the curtain in the ordination hall, you might be disappointed. As Phra Goh puts it: life is an illusion, and the real purpose is to reduce greed, promote goodness, and not get too attached to the fleeting highs of worldly success.
Monks pursue the religious path not to escape, but to clarify — to practice what they preach, and to become an example for those who are still navigating the rollercoaster of material life. They strive to balance spiritual depth with compassion, wisdom, and (on good days) impeccable punctuality to morning chanting.
Roadmap to Monkhood: So You’re Still Interested?
So: are you in your early twenties, pondering enlightenment? Start by attending a meditation class, try a temple retreat (bonus points if you survive three weeks without your favorite streaming service), and stay curious. When you’re ready, approach a monastery. They’ll outline the steps, rules, and rituals — all designed to separate fleeting wants from lasting contentment.
No matter which Buddhist tradition you pursue (Theravada, Mahayana, or otherwise), the fundamental journey remains: a challenging, rewarding commitment to self-mastery and service. And if your family needs convincing, just remind them: monks rarely make shopping lists.
Final Thoughts: Is Monk Life Right For You?
Monkhood isn’t escaping life; it’s embracing it from a radically different angle. Whether your journey leads you to a monastery in Singapore, Thailand, or even just your local meditation group, the path begins with a single question: “Am I ready to swap success for serenity—and still pick up the phone when mum calls?”
Becoming a monk is less about fleeing worldly troubles than finding deeper answers. And if you do take the leap, may your alms bowl be ever full, your heart ever light, and your sense of humor undiminished by 5am wake-up calls.
